Sunday, July 23, 2006

Arolf's Family Day

It was Arolf's Family Day in school (San Isidro Catholic School) today. We came in late coz it was raining hard here. My mom bought the puto at kutsinta that was the 'toka' of Arolf. She bought it from the market and placed it in a bilao.

Mom and Anea went to church first. It was just me, Arolf, and Tony who went to the gym. As soon as we got there, most of the kids shouted Arolf's name. Clearly, he's popular in school. A lot of kids came up to me and complained about him, like this one kid who said Arolf cut his bag or his notebook. Tsk! Tsk! Kawawang mga bata, naiisahan ng anak ko.

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Girls and boys alike went out to greet him, even kids from other sections! I didn't know how to feel. The only thing that lacked was the attention from the parents. I have never been friendly with other parents from school, even with Anea's classmates.

I still dunno how to react if they will ask me why Arolf behaves in a certain way. I dunno if I could say that he's special.

Anyway, he had a great time at first... running about, playing... dancing...

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but then it rained hard and he tried to cover his ears... i had to embrace him and tell him that everything will be fine and he should take off his fingers from his ears because people are beginning to stare. He did. He then just sat on my lap and wanted to go home already.

After eating, there was another game of Palayok and all the players were already chosen... He got into a tantrum since he wanted to play. I didn't let him coz I said he had to learn to accept realities.

We went home immediately.

All-in-all, it was ok. Tony even had so much fun.

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He got the experience we wanted. I saw his classmates' reaction towards him. I'm sure everything will be fine in time.

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I got so tired after the event that when we got home, i had to rest. my hands were shaking so bad... my heartbeat was irregular again, my vision is starting to blur, and i can't breathe properly.

i felt a little scared. i didn't know what i was experiencing. Is this the moment that I die, I asked myself. I just rested and dozed off a couple times.

I still feel bad now, but I'm just thinking that I'm gonna see my doctor again on Tuesday, so I can ask him what now. I'm going to the hospital too tomorrow for blood extraction.

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sometimes, i feel like the world has come around and shaken me up. That my world is starting to crumble because of this disease.

But when friends start texting at first light of the day, you hear your fone ring, you hear your kids' voice... it seems like God sends me angels everyday to brighten my horizon.

Send me more Angels, Lord.

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